fuck you, martha

The light we see from the star Betelgeuse actually left its location 525 years ago. I like leaving public television on in the background, except for when it goes to the shrieking test pattern. Is that noise necessary?

According to this article, the name Betelgeuse is derived from the Arabic ibt al jauzah, which is really fun to say and translates to "armpit of the central one." It's part of the shoulder of Orion and is 1,000 times the size of our sun, which is a medium sized star. Unfortunately, though Betelgeuse is one of the most well-known stars in our sky, it is close to the end of its life cycle. It's sort of poetic, I guess, that even after its big budget, special effect-style death, that it will live on, in our eyes, for another 525 years. Of course, it's still got about a million of years to go before it goes supernova.

I'm sure I've heard this kind of stuff before. I had an astronomy class at my first of three colleges, which, honestly, bored me half to death, but at least it requried me to go to the Hayden Planetarium, which is always fun.

That's the nice thing about public television; it encourages thought and feeds a curious mind. It sent me on this late night scavenger hunt on one of the largest known stars. That's all well and good, but, let's face it, PBS isn't the most exciting thing on the tube. That's why there's shows like Lost, which encourages much whooping and hollering and doe-eyed awe, all of which are more exciting than thoughtful queries and expanding horizons.

the criminal

Unfortunately, the lead-in for Lost is an entertainment tabloid show. I'm not sure which, because I only ever catch the last two minutes of it on Wednesdays. Tonight their parting story was the impending release of domestic goddess turned faux inmate Martha Stewart.

Everyone makes mistakes. She was found guilty, and she's serving her time, and soon, upon completion of her sentence, she'll be released. Fine. Great. Perhaps Martha will now follow the straight and narrow path; the system works and everyone's happy. So what if she was sentenced to what has to be the nicest looking prisons I've ever seen. Of course, she's rich and this is America, and that's why you want to be rich in America, so when you get pinched for being a deceitful fuck, you're sentenced to a federal resort with professional landscaping and comfortable uniforms, if you're actually convicted, that is. Okay. Whatever. I try not to let those things get to me, even though they do. But please, don't tell me that I should feel sorry for Martha. The 'anchor' of this show, Pat O'Brien, tried to convince me that Martha's had it rough in lock up.

the tool

"It's true," he says. "She hasn't received any special treatment."

The tool who created Survivor and Real World to give us his take on the situation.

"She's had to clean a floor waxing machine, and that's a pretty disgusting job."

The horror. At least she's not having to sell her ass for cigarettes; now that would be a story.