more money, more problems

The raise I got a couple months ago only made my financial situation worse. Enamoured by the larger number on my paychecks, I figured I could finally be comfortable and do whatever the fuck I wanted to do, like go to Los Angeles to see the Mets play the Dodgers. Of course, I had stars in my eyes, and the higher salary just about covers the rising cost of my living expenses. In short, as of right now, though I'm making more money than I ever have in my life, I have $9 in my bank account.

Whatever.

I'm late on a couple credit cards, but I'll get through the weekend. I worry about money all the time, only because I'm a fucking moron and think that I'm entitled to have a good time because I'm young and single and American. These are all lies of course. If I was young and single and American and rich, I could have all the fun I want, but as it stands now, I'm still hand to mouth, and sometimes, my hand is empty by the time it gets there...which is kinda poetic in a non-poetic way.

I went out tonight because the students are back in town and it's nice to see new faces, even though they're all far too young to think I'm cool. I also have beer stamps at many of the local bars, so I can drink for free.

I'm glad I went out, because my house is empty this weekend, and I don't do well living by myself. I couldnt' really afford food so I bought a couple of slices of pizza while I was bar hopping. It's not making much of a difference now, but I'm sure it will pay dividends in the morning. It had damn fucking well better.

First, I hit up the college meat market, because they take credit card and I still had some limit left. I ordered a rum and coke and got the change back so I could leave tips elsewhere. From there, I ended up at meathead tavern because of my beer stamps. I met up with some people from work there--most of whom had played a benefit show for a local charity. I wanted to go, but it cost 10 bucks to get in.

I hate meathead tavern, but it's hard to complain too much when the drinks are free. The jukebox kinda sucks, unless you live in a snowboarding video, but occasionally some good shit will play, like some old Metallica or something. Even that's starting to grate on my nerves, but seriously, I freak out everytime I hear "Master of Puppets" and I don't care who knows it.

After there, I ended up at the local watering hole where I met up with another coworker for last call. She told me I was yelling about something, but I really hadn't had much to eat today except for a couple slices of pizza and a smoothie. The smoothie was really good.

I'm just glad I'm home now and realized that my cable's InDemand service offers music. Fucking good music too. For no additional cost, I've already watched the "Blue Orchid" by The White Stripes, a lengthy excerpt from the Yeah Yeah Yeahs live DVD, and, right now, a live performance from The Pixies when Black Francis was still all young and thin and stuff and had a full head of hair. They sound unbelievable and it's not just because I'm drunk. I keep yelling at the TV screen for them to play "Gigantic." I really, really hope they do.